EP.50: Emotional Healing Life Coaching: Why It's Important and How It Can Benefit You

Show Notes

What if your healing journey unlocked a deeper understanding of yourself and paved the way to live authentically, according to your unique blueprint?

For the last episode of this season, I want to delve deep into the transformative process of emotional healing life coaching.

You are born into this world with so much conditioning encoded within your DNA that you may not be aware of until you allow your fearless curiosity to guide you.

That’s why I want to share my gift with you: emotional healing life coaching and the benefits of undergoing this transformative process.

Here are the highlights from this episode:

04:57 - The difference between coaching, counselling, and therapy

08:35 - The benefits of emotional healing life coaching

10:08 - The importance of living according to one's individual blueprint 

15:39 - How emotional healing life coaching reduces stress and anxiety

19:31 - How to develop a foolproof strategy to improve decision making process

24:26 - Emotional healing life coaching focuses on long-term transformation, not quick fixes.

 

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About Me:

I help you lead with fearless authenticity by smashing the self-imposed heteronormative stereotypes that keep you playing small through emotional healing inner child and inherited intergenerational trauma. Create a purposeful life of your unique design by disrupting societal norms and expectations of who you should be. Explore mindfulness, fearless curiosity and loving kindness through the lens of Human Design to thrive as the person you are born to be.

Learn more about my coaching method and join my emotional healing, mindfulness, and music community at melissaindot.com.

 

TRANSCRIPT

[00:00:00] The greatest impact you have for this world is to show up as the person that you are born to be, your unique person, your unique purpose, your unique passions, and your unique power is needed in this tapestry of life.

[00:00:30] Hey there. Welcome to the Fearlessly Curious Podcast, your safe space to listen, lean in and learn the diversity of human experiences through the lens of fearless curiosity. When we learn more about each other, we also learn more about ourselves. How? Because when we listen to each other's curiosities and experiences, we relate to that which is in common, and that which sets us apart, gives us something to reflect on. 

[00:00:53] We learn through and with each other. I'm grateful to you, the global community, for your curious questions. The Fearlessly Curious Podcast cannot exist without you.

[00:01:09] And welcome to another episode of the Fearlessly Curious Podcast. And I can't quite believe that this is episode 50 and this is actually the final episode, at least for this season, I've got to promise you one thing. I'll definitely be back. You have been an amazing community. I've had amazing feedback.

[00:01:28] The ratings have been incredible. And that is just a measure of the impact that this podcast has had on you. And that is the whole purpose of this podcast is to provide a resource for those of you who are fearlessly curious about your personal growth, your personal development, and your self healing journey.

[00:01:51] Apart from sharing my own personal journey of self healing, transformation, sobriety, moving through addiction, gaining confidence, gaining awareness of my unique blueprint through human design, through music, and through walking the world. With a curious and open mind and heart, I have been able to connect with so many of you from around the world, and my prayer is that you remain inspired and motivated to stay curious, to continue asking why, and not allow yourself to be limited by the conditioning that so much of society provides us.

[00:02:31] We are also so limited by our DNA, by what we inherit through our parents and our grandparents and our lineage. We are born into this world with so much conditioning entrenched, encoded within our DNA that we could never be aware of until you allow your curiosity to lead you to heart expanding and mind blowing modalities and systems of therapeutic practices that allow for us to access this information that is beyond the mind, therapies such as family constellations, therapies such as deep contemplative practices and meditation, all of which we've covered at some point or another on this Fearlessly Curious podcast.

[00:03:13] So once again, thank you again for being such an incredible community. I hope that you will continue to share these episodes, that you will lean into these episodes as your personal resource for those moments when you are confused in life, for those moments when you feel all hope is gone, for those moments when you feel totally lost.

[00:03:29] I hope that you remember that you have in your pocket, just at the end of your finger, your phone and your computer, access to this as a resort, as a reminder that there is someone out there, that there is a resource out there, that there is help out there and a community out here to continue to support you on your fearlessly curious journey.

[00:03:50] Episode 50. I guess there's no better way than to round up. this episode by talking about what my calling is here in this life, my purpose for you. And that is to be your emotional healing life coach. My biggest value, as you know, is freedom. And with freedom comes that fearless curiosity. So beyond this podcast, you know that you can connect with me on our online community.

[00:04:17] You can connect with me on various social media platforms, be it Instagram, be it Facebook, LinkedIn. Be it through this podcast itself. And I don't want to be limited by time. So going beyond this, if you search my name, there's going to be a multitude of other ways for you to get hold of me. I am always here for you through these free resources.

[00:04:37] And when you are ready to deep dive in a more intentional, therapeutic, transformational, profoundly transformational journey with me as your emotional healing life coach, then it's important for you to understand what that means. So what are the benefits exactly of emotional healing and from a life coach?

[00:04:57] First and foremost, I need to define the difference between coaching, counselling, and therapy. So counselling and therapy are common options for those of you out there, and perhaps you're familiar with this. Those of you out there seeking help with emotional healing. Emotional healing means learning to get to know your emotions, how they may be limiting you in life, how they may be holding you back, how they may be blocking you and how to move through them.

[00:05:25] And this refers to all types of emotions. Often when we talk about emotional healing, we think about the more negative emotions like anger, frustration, sadness, and grief, but toxic positivity through our high level emotions. So joy. When we are experiencing joy through addiction, we can be blindsided by what we call high energy emotions.

[00:05:46] So when we begin the emotional healing journey, the purpose is to get to know what our, what your emotions are and what they feel for you, because as you know. Each of us is unique and different. So what is love to me may look and feel different to you. What is anger to me may look and feel different to you too.

[00:06:04] So it's important for you to get to know your emotions and what they look and feel like to you, and then develop your own strategy to navigate to build a relationship with these emotions in a way that empowers you, build a relationship with your emotions in a way that you can leverage it to amplify your strengths and hold you in your vulnerabilities.

[00:06:26] So you have counselling and you have therapy. Now, emotional healing life coaching offers unique benefits that are separate to counselling and therapy. First of all, counselling and therapy are typically provided by licensed mental health professionals, and they tend to use evidence-based techniques to help individuals overcome emotional challenges.

[00:06:49] Counselling and therapy are often used to treat mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety. On the other hand, emotional healing life coaching, which is what I bring to the table, is focused primarily on helping individuals like you to achieve personal growth and development. So there is a goal, there is an end game.

[00:07:12] That is elevated from where you are today. So not hyper focus just on healing, but on your development and growth, not just on finding comfort in yourself, but using that ability to find comfort, to get somewhere, to be at a different state. So coaches in general work with individuals to identify their goals and to help you develop specific strategies to achieve these goals.

[00:07:39] In this case, as an emotional healing life coach, I am supporting you to develop your unique strategy to overcome your emotional challenges, your emotional traumas, your emotional confusion, and to improve your overall well being in relation to your emotions. Emotional healing life coaching is not a replacement for counselling or therapy.

[00:08:03] It is rather a complimentary approach that can help you achieve greater self awareness and personal growth. My emotional healing life coaching does offer therapeutic benefits as well, but I am not a licensed counsellor, neither am I a licensed therapist. I am, however, a certified life coach. I am a certified family constellations practitioner and family constellations is a therapeutic system and practice.

[00:08:35] And so I do have licensed per se, certified qualification, so you're safe with me. So let's talk about the benefits of emotional healing life coaching in particular. The unique benefits include clarity and direction. Now often our direction in life, our course in life is very much set up by what our strengths are.

[00:08:59] And these strengths tend to be what we're told as children, what we're, what we excel in at school, at college. We often, way too often, abandon the direction that our heart is telling us to go in, so it could lie in a passion, it could lie in something that typically society does not see as being professional, it sees more as something that is more a hobby, something that you would do on the side.

[00:09:24] Emotional healing life coaching will support you in realigning to the direction of your soul, soul direction, heart direction, not the world and the external environment is telling you, you should do, but to follow the direction of your inner compass, your intuition, your heart, something that is soul and spirit led and getting clarity on that direction.

[00:09:48] And then building the strategy to turn that vision, that clarity of vision that you have seeded within you into action steps that realise that vision into reality. So number one, one of the main benefits of emotional healing and life coaching is that it helps you gain clarity and direction in your life.

[00:10:08] That it's aligned to your unique path, your unique signature, and your unique purpose, because there's only one of you in the world, and it is your absolute responsibility to live your life according to your blueprint, not somebody else's, because there's only one of you. So if you don't live it your way, who will?

[00:10:25] That wisdom will be lost if you do not fulfil your purpose of being you. So I work with you to identify your values. Not the ones you've been told, but your core values that live and burn within your heart and soul. I help you identify your passions, your goals from those passions, and to develop a plan of action to achieve them.

[00:10:46] Secondly, emotional healing life coaching will support building your self confidence. How does it improve your self confidence? Well, by identifying and addressing your limiting beliefs and negative self talk. Again, many of these limiting beliefs and negative self-talk are inherited or they come from your conditioning because so much of our lives we are told To be less of who we are to become more of someone we are not.

[00:11:10] And that means clipping our wings. That means silencing our truth. And often that means abandoning what we believe to be true in our hearts in order to fit into a mould that was created for you. So that damages your self confidence. When you're told that you're not enough for you, you need to change who you are to fit in.

[00:11:31] That would damage. confidence in anybody. So it's totally natural. So we improve self confidence by addressing what your limiting beliefs are and your negative self-talk, and we start the journey of reframing them. One of the tools that I use specifically to support self confidence is something called human design, which in past episodes, you'll find more information about.

[00:11:55] So I work with you to develop a more empowered self image and mindset, one that is aligned to your core values and your purpose to be the truest, honest, most powerful version of who you're born to be. The third benefit would be increased self awareness. We lean into fearless curiosity. We will ask why.

[00:12:17] Why am I like this? Why do I have this belief? Why did I change my mind? Why did I abandon who I am to be someone I am not? The more aware that we become of our environment and our influences and our vulnerabilities and our distractions, but also our strengths and our gifts and our power, the more we can stand in our fearless authenticity in this world, the more that we can work, walk the path that is true to you and no one else, and the more impacts you can create from simply being you, less doing, more being, less work and more effort, less showing up in life.

[00:12:59] With me, you'll develop a deeper understanding of you, your emotions, your motivations, and your life. The power to create a life designed by you, for you. So the third benefit, increased self awareness. The fourth benefit would be to have enhanced relationships. When you know who you are, at least when you have the confidence to hold onto a fearless curiosity knowing that the path of life is infinite growth, it's constant growth, because you're always evolving, then you learn to be more compassionate with yourself.

[00:13:34] And as you improve the relationship with yourself, inevitably, you walk the world being able to improve the relationships you have with others. Because your relationships with others is a direct reflection of the relationship you have with yourself. The clearer you are with yourself, the better you are at communicating your own clarity with others, and the more patience you have with yourself, the more ability you have to be patient with others.

[00:14:01] So this just simply enhances your emotional intelligence. And when your emotional intelligence is enhanced, then all your relationships are enhanced. Fifth benefit is a better work life balance. It will help you achieve this because once you become more aware, self aware of what works for you, where your strengths are and your vulnerabilities, then you'll spend less time doing what you don't like.

[00:14:29] You'll spend less time trying to be someone you're not and you save time in the practice of living with more alignment. You save time because you're doing and you're being and living in alignment. You're not wasting your time and your effort doing jobs, contributing and putting your time in spaces where you're not appreciated or your effort and your presence is not valued.

[00:14:57] So you get a better work-life balance because first of all, you'll be choosing work that is aligned to you. And you know, when you love what you do, then it never feels like work. So you'll also learn about boundaries through your self awareness practices. And when you. Learn more about your boundaries.

[00:15:15] You'll be able to create better boundaries when it comes to work and life balance. You'll have more work life integration because you'll be able to prioritise yourself, you'll be able to have better awareness of your self care, and you'll be able to then create and curate a lifestyle that is more integrated when it comes to work and life.

[00:15:39] The sixth benefit of emotional healing life coaching with me is clearly reduced stress and anxiety. How? Because you access the root cause of your stress and anxiety. And again, I'll go back to human design, but that's one of the main tools that I use for you to learn what your unique blueprint is and how to build strategies around that blueprint.

[00:16:03] It's all through experimentation. It's all through curiosity. We come up with the strategies, you're given time to go out in the world and implement them. And then you have me as your coach in your pocket daily to check in, to share what your experience is so that I can guide you in where you may be blindsided so that I can

[00:16:21] Support you on those moments where you feel all is lost because let's face it, growth is painful because you are making a choice to change perhaps years, decades of one way of living in order to live a different way that takes time, that takes stretching, that takes focus and practice, and it takes a lot of patience, it takes a lot of kindness.

[00:16:47] And we often want to see transformation overnight, and it can cause stress, stress because in our minds we're being told, I need to change who I am, but really what we're doing with emotional healing life coaching is we're changing what the mind thinks so that you can be more of who you already are. and cause less stress from trying to be someone you are not.

[00:17:15] Because that's where the real stress lives, is when we're fighting against the tide. Through emotional healing life coaching, you figure out what your own rhythm of life is. You figure out your own tide, and you flow with your tide, rather than live a life that is designed for someone else that is according to somebody else's time.

[00:17:37] And you're constantly fighting against what is natural and flow for you, because that's what causes the stress. So together we will curate strategies and tools to help you manage your stress, to understand why your stress is there. What tide are you pushing against and how could you become more fine tuned to your own personal tide and timing and build a strategy where you can flow with life.

[00:18:02] And still live in a world that's telling you to live differently. The seventh benefit would be improved decision making. Because once you get clarity on your own specific decision making strategy, and that might be listening to your gut reaction, and no matter what, never moving from that, you feel the fuck yes in your gut and you follow through.

[00:18:24] And I'll give you the script for those moments when perhaps someone is doubting you or for those moments when your own open mind, your own, perhaps you are neurodiverse, perhaps you are ADHD and your mind takes you to a million places. What is the strategy to just stick with the gut feeling that you know never fails you?

[00:18:43] That is something we curate together, or maybe you discover that your decision making process lives in your emotions, that even when someone demands an answer in the moment, the most powerful thing you can do is to not give an answer in the moment, but instead feel the emotion that that question, that that prompt fires up in you and to ride that emotion, whether it's an emotional high or an emotional low, what is the strategy to ride that emotion?

[00:19:10] Because the wisdom. Because the answer that is most aligned to you comes at the end of that wave, like surfing a wave on the ocean. You need to enjoy the journey of that emotional wave. And when you least expect it, when you're not at a high or a low, boom, the answer drops, the correct decision drops for you.

[00:19:31] Or maybe your decision making strategy might be a little whisper that you get or goosebumps on your skin. So for everybody, it's different. And this is what we would explore with me as your emotional healing life coach. Once we explore this, you develop a foolproof strategy that will improve your decision making process, and it will be in line with your values and your goals.

[00:19:53] We're coming to the end soon now, three more. All right. So the eighth benefit would be greater accountability. Cause obviously you have me, you have me in your pocket. I work very closely with you to set up your life goals, the life strategies to put into action, to achieve living. It's not a doing, it's a living, being your life goal.

[00:20:15] And I help you stay on track to achieve these goals. You have me in your pocket. That means you have me daily. Now I'm not going to be here to spoon feed you. I will be here to call you out lovingly. Right. I'm not going to be every day calling you up and messaging you and saying where you're at. Why aren't you showing up for yourself?

[00:20:32] But when I follow my own intuition and I call you in, you will feel it. But you will feel it in a way where there will be no shame. You'll feel it in a way where you will be inspired and motivated to show up with an open heart and an open mind. And to be able to call your own self out in a way that is empowering and uplifting and transformational, because I'm here as your guide and your coach, but the purpose here is to leave you feeling empowered to live your life independent, not needing to come back to me.

[00:21:05] No, I'm here to guide and coach you to get to know who you are, to develop your strategies, to implement them in a way that turns your life around so you can live empowered, autonomous, with a lot of play and curiosity so that when you walk into a room, whether you're an introvert or extrovert, you emanate an aura that inspires others to be the best version of themselves just like you.

[00:21:30] You don't need me. Once we're done, we're done. So great accountability. You can count on me. I will stand by you through thick or thin during that time that I'm your emotional healing life coach to cheer you, to call you out lovingly, to hold you in those most vulnerable moments. And to remind you of your greatness, that there is nothing for you to do to be great, because you were born amazing.

[00:21:54] And the only thing that we're doing is peeling back the layers and shedding all the stuff that you've inherited and that has been conditioned within you, that is all we're doing. releasing. So with greater accountability comes greater self discipline and a sense of responsibility for your own emotional well being.

[00:22:12] So you become more aware, you understand what your emotions are, and you gain the tools and the strategies to navigate those emotions so that you can feel more empowered and leverage them to amplify your strengths. Of course, having me as your emotional healing life coach means that there is a personalised approach, right?

[00:22:32] Your experience is, with me, tailor-made to your specific and unique needs and goals. And as we journey together, we get to refine them more and more and more and more. And because you're also evolving, these tools that you get allow for that space for your continued evolution. We will devise a plan and that plan will be your template that you can update every year, every five years and every 10 years.

[00:22:58] And if further down the line, you want to revisit me, you have a new goal, then I'm there for you. But that plan, like I said, is developed as a template for you. And this plan will account for your strengths and your vulnerabilities and your personal preferences and your values and your goals. You are born to be your passion, your purpose.

[00:23:17] This will support you to feel a hundred percent invested in your own healing process, as you develop a greater sense of ownership and agency over your emotional wellbeing, so you can live a life where you are thriving, even through those moments that are challenging. You understand, you have a deep, deep knowing that the challenge really is there.

[00:23:43] To stretch you into the next level of growth. Finally, with me as your emotional healing life coach, I promise you long term transformation. Now how do I make that promise because I know when you show up for this, you are fully invested. Because when I show up fully invested in you once you begin your journey, it is nothing but inevitable.

[00:24:06] That your long term transformation is guaranteed because you will continue to show up for yourself. It's like, once you've tasted the honey, why would you taste anything else? That's exactly what it's about. My focus is on your long term transformation, not quick short term fixes, not a hack, you are worth so much more than a hack.

[00:24:26] Long lasting change is the intention, is the focus and is the purpose. And I support and coach you to achieve your full potential over the period of your life, because the templates and the tools and the strategies are there for you to reset, renew and up as you evolve. So my friends, I hope that that's been super clear for you.

[00:24:53] It would be a privilege to walk the journey of life. One chapter of your journey of life with you so that I can support you on your emotional healing journey. We will use human design, we will use music, but more than anything, we will use a lot of curiosity and play to explore the person you are born to be.

[00:25:13] To let go, release, and heal the layers of conditioning and trauma that you have inherited to create space for you to thrive. Because the greatest impact you have for this world is to show up as the person that you are born to be. Your unique person, your unique purpose, your unique passions, and your unique power is needed in this tapestry of life.

[00:25:41] So while counselling and therapy are important tools for those of you out there seeking emotional healing, emotional healing life coaching offers unique benefits that are so worth exploring, so worth considering. Emotional healing life coaching provides a focus. on your personal growth, on your spiritual awakening with great accountability and a personalised approach that's rooted, that has a foundation in love, because that's who we truly are.

[00:26:11] We are a different version, expression of love. And through love, every individual has the potential to reach and to soar and to thrive through your emotional wellbeing goals. Until next season, my dear, dear friends, thank you for being a part of this Fearlessly Curious community. And I hope to see you on the online community too.

[00:26:39] I will be more present there, going to be doing a lot more writing and a lot more in person events and hopefully be able to bring some workshops and retreats to those of you further afield from Malaysia and around the world. If you'd love to leave me a comment, I would love to hear from you and I respond to all messages that I receive.

[00:26:56] Thank you again for being an amazing part of this community and until season two, remember that this is a bank of resources for you. If you need to reach in at any time, and do your part too to share any episode that brings transformation to you, to other people that you love and care for. Until next time my friends, stay fearlessly curious.

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EP : S02E06 - What if having Authentic Conversations about Sex & Trauma Could Heal us?

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EP.49: Friends with Benefits: Navigating Choices, Creating Home, and the Art of Giving with Joo Teoh and Adeleena Lim